I looked back on us today, and I honestly don’t know why I missed you, and why I wanted you back. Sure, at the beginning we were kids rushing into things we had no idea what about, but slowly, instead of trusting you more, I trusted you less, and the more I loved you, the less I loved myself. But now I’m free, and I’m not sorry. I had to get out. I knew it was over long before you said it. And I thought you broke my heart, but you merely made it stronger, made it resilient. Of course I’ll never forget you, but there’s no way I’m ever going back. So goodbye, my first love. Thank you for being such a fabulous waste of time.

I will never understand why I ended up this way or what the reason was for. I’ll never understand why this world is so fucked up and barely anyone cares. I’ll never understand alot of things, like why people lie, cheat, and steal. Why they are rude, mean, bitchy, horrible, and inconsiderate. I’ll never understand how pain never goes away. I’ll never understand love or hate. I’ll never understand life. 

I want a guy who takes charge, but lets me 
have my say once in a while. A good relationship 
is all about balance and chemistry. - Taylor Swift.

Everything will be okay. Think about what happened a year ago today. You probably can’t even remember. Everything that seems important now won’t be anymore. Things find a way of working themselves out. Things aren’t as impossible as they seem. Don’t think about how broken your heart is right now, don’t think about how things won’t work and how hard everything seems to always be. You have two moving feet and a heart that beats. Use your feet and go find someone or something to make your heart happy. Whatever happens is what is what is supposed to happen. Maybe it won’t always work out, I can’t promise you that it will. But there is no reason to believe you won’t be okay. There is no reason to believe everything won’t work out.

No matter what you do, bad or good, people are always gonna have something to say about it. Just remember this: if people always have something to say about your life, that’s saying little about their own. Keep your head up, stay strong, and just breathe. Live. If you needed some encouragement today, this is it. So don’t waste it. Pass it on, spread it, but most importantly believe it.

There it goes again. That heavy feeling in your chest when you don’t feel any desire to speak or move. All you want to do is close your eyes and sleep, because the process of being broken is incredibly exhausting. You attempt your best to make your days fulfilling, but no matter how hard you try you can’t seem to connect to anyone or anything.

What am I afraid of? I’m afraid of not having enough time to right the wrongs I’ve made, of not having 
enough time to prove everyone wrong about me. Not having enough time to really live my life like I 
want to live it and I’m terrified of not having enough time to find the one I love.